How do I change the icon that is displayed when I send emails?
Missive fetches these icons from your email service provider or your website. Note that this does not dictate the appearance of your emails when recipients read them. Every email app has its own way of displaying sender icons.
If you do want to force your avatar in as many apps as possible, you should set a Gravatar. Gravatar is a global avatar hosting service. Missive supports Gravatar as do many other apps.